How Are You?

You may or may not know, that the standard greeting in Australia is Hi, how are you? This is used when you approach shop assistants, when you enter shops, when you phone people - everywhere. It leaves me a bit non plussed, because it obliges you to reply that you are great etc and how are you, when actually all you wanted to know was where the silver foil aisle is. Obviously, no one actually wants to know how you are, but I've decided that next time someone asks I'm going to tell them. I'm going to say - well, actually I'm rubbish. I feel utterly s**t and I have done for over 3 weeks now. I never sleep because I'm coughing all night and my nose and sinuses are so bunged up I feel as if my head is going to explode. And apart from you I haven't spoken to anyone all day. And how are you?....

As you can gather, today has not been the best day of my life and I have even allowed myself a sob in bed this evening. I know you are all bored to death of this by now, and that this blog is starting to read like a chronicle of my diseases, but I have not felt this awful for some years. And I'm fed up of it. Also, you know when you are not well, you want your own bed in your own home and to get snuggled up and feel all homely? Well, my home is on the other side of the world, and all the stuff that made it homely is on a ship somewhere. And this is when I allowed myself to have a cry. I know I want to be here, but I hadn't anticipated in these first most lonely weeks feeling so ill. And today I had to drive them to school, but at that time of day it would take an hour to drive back, so I went and parked by the sea and slept. And then when I woke up there was no point in driving back to the flat so I went and dragged myself round the Mall and did the food shopping before picking up the children and then it took and hour of solid traffic to drive back.

However, on a more positive note, the children were both very chipper when I picked them up, and arrangements have been made for Anna to have a sleepover at her 'best' friend Keana's house next Friday, and I'm going to try to arrange for George's friend to come to us the same night. And a chap phoned my about a choir I had enquired about, and I will try to make it to their concert on Sunday night to see what they are like, and there is a get together for all Year 4 families at a park on Sunday morning, where I should get to meet some other people, and raise the chances of me having a conversation with someone every now and again. And we think we have found a flat in Dee Why (close to the school) which we can move into on 15th May until the house at Narrabeen is ready. So not all bad in fact.

I feel rather guilty about this post. I know being here is a wonderful opportunity and I should be grateful for every moment. And I also know that I live a pretty charmed life and I'm very lucky. I know that once I actually feel like myself again, I will go out and grasp everything that living here offers me. Carpe Diem. But just for today, I'm going to wallow.....sorry about that....