Good times...bad times...

It's been a tough few weeks.

When we came out here, we thought we had a pretty good idea of which one of our two children would be the most challenged by the experience. Anna was always brimming over with confidence and able to find a friend anywhere. George was more reserved and introspective, and took time to make connections with people. We thought Anna would take it in her stride and George might need more support and nurturing.

How wrong we were......

We've spent the last couple of weeks coming to terms with the fact that Anna is desperately unhappy at school. There have been warning signs. More sickness than usual, and many illnesses appearing on Sunday evening and disappearing once she got to school. A lack of interest in how she looked at school. A declining academic and behavioural record.

Then suddenly a big meltdown. Apparently she hates the school, always has - but didn't want to disappoint us. She doesn't feel at home there and feels that she doesn't fit in.

It's desperate when your children are unhappy. After a few weeks of discussions, and taking advice from professionals, Andrew and I had a worry that had been at the back of our minds confirmed. You might remember that when we arrived here, Anna went into Year 4 - which meant she went up from having 2 school years between her and George to only one. Initially this worked very well, and we felt it had been a good decision. However....this year the older of those girls are over 11 and a half. At just 10 and not 11 till next May, Anna has been struggling to keep up with their level of maturity. At the same time, because these children have been at school for longer than her, she has gone from excelling to being very average. This has been confusing for her, and has knocked her confidence.

Anna is just not old enough for Year 5, and certainly not for Year 6 starting in January.

The result is that we are moving her from the school, and placing her at a local school where she will repeat Year 5. This will give her the opportunity to regain some of the confidence and self belief she has lost, and also get her back in a year group with whom she has more parity in terms of maturity.

Since we have made this decision and sorted it all out, Anna has been like a different child at home. Or at least, she's been more like the child we were used to having around. It's not going to be a bed of roses when she starts at the new school I'm sure, but we are keeping our fingers crossed that we've made the right decision.

On a more positive note, there have been other, happier things going on in Anna's life. Her netball team won the Summer Competition (you will remember they won the winter one as well). They have not been beaten by anyone all year! How amazing is that?? Anna is getting quite a collection of trophies! Also, we went to see her dance school end of year show, and saw Anna dance for the first time. Now I know I am a bit biased - but she's rather good! Next year she will be doing 7 dance classes a week, luckily just down the road, and she is very proud that she will be in a performance team.

It now being the 28th November, we have been waiting with baited breath for a glimpse of George's Nintendo Wii advert, as it was released on the 26th in the States. So far, however, after repeated trawling the web and YouTube, I've not been able to find it. Which is very frustrating. I'll keep looking for it, and as soon as I've located it, I'll put a link on here. And if anyone is in the States and sees it, please do let us know!

Perfection

George has just completed his first ever working week. Well - two days. And I suspect that it will be a long time before he earns that much money in so short a time again. We were very proud of him. He worked hard, was charming, was patient and focussed and never complained, although I know at times it was rather tedious.

It turned out that Nintendo Wii adverts are big budget productions. The director hired was Aaron Ruell, who is both a renowned photographer and director of independent films and an actor who has appeared in a number of Hollywood films, most notably 'Napoleon Dynamite'. He is, apparently, the up and coming man of the moment in the film world. It was, therefore, especially exciting when he asked if he could photograph George for his photographic website (www.aruell.com). He likes unusual looking people and takes very detailed photographs. We'll let you know when the photos are on the site, and that's one of his at the top there.

The actual advert will only be shown on American and Canadian TV, and will be released on 26th November, after which time it should be able to be found on YouTube. Oddly enough, there were 3 children in the commercial, of which two were English. So they were filming an American advert with two little English boys in Australia. The world sure is a small place these days.

It was really fascinating being there. It occurred to me that these days we are so familiar with adverts, films, and tv, and yet what goes into its creation is such a mystery to us. What amazed me most was the attention to detail. Everything had to be absolutely perfect - and this often meant doing things over and over and over again (not easy when you are an active twelve year old boy!). They would take a shot, and then start again because they wanted to move a teacup, or remove a person, or change some item of wardrobe because they didn't feel it was working.

Which brings me to the title of this post. We talk a lot these days about the influence of the media in terms of body image and the pressure to be perfect. We are sold the idea that we should aspire to look like women who are 20 years younger than us, airbrushed and injected, and we are disappointed when we can't keep up. But I realised watching this shoot that the idea of perfection pervades our society far more broadly than that. Through the media we are shown homes which have been styled by interior designers and stylists with no expense spared. Every detail of every thing we see on tv and film has been carefully selected, and then carefully placed in the scene. Nothing is left to chance. Throughout the filming wardrobe and makeup flit on and off the set, smoothing hair which doesn't look out of place to the human eye, straightening collars, pulling down hems and generally ensuring everyone looks picture perfect. Other people move teacups, flowers and other items around until the director and the advertising agency are satisfied. At one point, an extra disappeared and another one replaced him, as the agency had decided they didn't like his look (the poor man was only sitting at a cafe table pretending to talk to a blonde woman. Brutal).

All this creates a lot of pressure on us mere mortals, who are not followed around by make up and wardrobe and set hands. The media sends us the message that we must not only look perfect and be perfect, but our homes and our lives must be perfect too.

No wonder we are all going a bit nuts....

Almost Famous

Enormous excitement in the Pettifer household this week. George got the Nintendo job!

Now, of course, Andrew and I have always felt he was especially beautiful and talented, but it's nice to know someone else thinks so too!

Filming is at Fox Studios in Sydney on Monday and Tuesday, so he also gets a couple of days off school (which obviously George thinks is a huge bonus. He won't still be thinking that once I've produced the huge bundle of school work he will be doing to make sure that he keeps up...).

As a result of George telling all his mates at school, I think his cool quotient is on the up and up. It's been a good couple of days for him - he got the Nintendo job, he scored a distinction in a national computing studies exam (performed in the top 11% nationally) and a girl he likes phoned and asked him over. When you are 12, I don't think it gets much better than that.

We've just been to the studios for a wardrobe call. George's cool quotient started to decline when we found out that they were filming two adverts, and instead of being the nephew in ad 1, George was now the grandson in ad 2. The grandson in ad 2 is from the deep south of America, and before we knew it, George was dressed in denim dungarees and a checkered shirt. There goes any hope of being cool. But wait a minute! It's only being shown in the US. Saved! Or he would be if no one had ever invented the world wide web, and no one ever looked at You Tube...

Nevertheless, George did look very cute, and the directors and everyone else involved were very happy. For a child who is not particularly confident, the session today involved a number of moments where I know he felt very uncomfortable - a wardrobe room with two women and the door wide open (we are no longer permitted to see George in his underwear), and then once he was in his costume, about 7 people came in the room, gathered around him and just looked at him for a really long time. They were all American, and eventually he was pronounced to be 'working it' and they left. George and I giggled. Everyone was very friendly, the atmosphere was very relaxed, and I know it is going to be a very interesting experience for both George and me. There was lovely food too...

Whilst all this has been occupying our thoughts a bit this week, we mustn't forget that Anna has been on school camp to Bathurst - a former goldmining area. We haven't heard much about it just yet, as she is still dreadfully overtired and a bit stroppy. On Friday it was 38 degrees here, and only just about bearable, and it is usually far hotter the further inland you go, so I hate to think what the temperature was there. Everyone is telling us that they are expecting a very hot summer, especially after the rubbish one we had last year. I'm not sure whether to be pleased or not. I know we can cope with up to 38 degrees, but I'm not sure about over 40. Good job we've got good aircon in this house!

Feeling neglected?

The children playing on Lighthouse Beach, Seal Rocks



George and Luke catching a wave on Lighthouse Beach



The cars on Lighthouse Beach, prior to us getting stuck!



Ian hunting for peepies (not sure if that is right or not, but they are shellfish!) with some of the girls.



Lighthouse Beach



All the children, with the exception of Zoe, who didn't want to be in the picture. Fair enough!



Some of the boys on the Treachery Beach sand dunes.



Treachery Beach at the back of the campsite.



Richard at the top of the sand dunes. They were 'kin HUGE!



Looking through the campsite towards the dunes.



Dingo!!!



Feeding the five thousand....



Boat Beach at Seal Rocks



Boat Beach at Seal Rocks

Oops.

I don't seem to have done the blog for like....a month.....

It's been busy you see.

We moved house. Again. We went to work, we went to school, we went to after school activities, we went to bbqs, we went to the beach, we played sport and we enjoyed the sunshine.

Sorry about that.

There is an evil rumour circulating that I've given up on the blog. Not so! I've just let life take over a little.

The thing about real life is that wherever you are, a lot of it is pretty mundane. Not much to write home about, as they say.

I could tell you about how I make the packed lunches every night, shout at the children about their homework/cleaning teeth/tidying rooms etc etc. But we could all write about that.

Nevertheless, there are interesting things to report. We went camping again - 19 of us (12 children OMG) in the Myall Lakes National Park at Treachery Beach. We saw dolphins, whales, dingoes (yes, real actual dingoes in our campsite - funnily enough, we didn't see many human babies there) and lots of bush turkeys. We drove our four wheel drives onto a deserted beach (and got them stuck in the sand, much to mine and Nicky's amusement, a sentiment not shared by the menfolk, who were digging them out....). The children discovered surfing down sand dunes - a sport they learnt about via trial and error, Luke initially surfing down the sand dune and into a tree, and luckily avoiding serious injury. The ladies learnt to play poker, and then this lady beat all the men (hehe). Obviously, as the weather was wonderful, I managed to get a bit pinker than I had intended. We took the children home happy, exhausted and filthy, as you should after camping. Hope you enjoy the pictures.

The children are now back into the final term of the year, which this time around is only 7 weeks long! They break up on 1st December and don't go back until the end of January. Lovely in many ways, but an awful long time to keep them amused, even here. Good job we have Christmas in the middle and a visit from Grandma and Grandad. Between now and then we have a flurry of events - parties, Anna's dancing show, Speech Day, Basketball presentations etc etc. Hopefully at some stage we will find the time to relax in our new pool and spa, and enjoy our lovely new home!

Before I end (and try to upload the camping photos, which I fear will be tortuous, as the internet connection here seems to be rather intermittent - as in whenever I want to use it, it is not working...), you should know that our resident super model has just had a recall for a Nintendo Wii TV advert, and will be travelling into the city tomorrow for his second audition as 'the nephew'. Fingers crossed - if he gets it he will earn enough money to pay for 2 terms of school fees. Lol.

Being Forty...

So.

Lets recap on how being forty is going thus far.

In my mind, being forty was going to be wonderful. I was going to be thin and extremely fabulous. It was going to be my best decade yet.

There were signs, however, in the days beforehand that this might not turn out quite as well as I had fantasised. For example, having a customer in the shop putting my tummy and saying 'are you hiding a baby bump?'. No. Actually not. I am hiding being fat. And not very well, it would seem.

Also, on my last day as a 39 year old, I enjoyed my walk home from work in the sunshine very much. And then when I got home realised that the car was not on the drive. Because I had left it at work. Not the actions of a young, vibrant person with no signs of early Alzheimers, I'd say.

And then there was the actual day itself....spent running between bed and toilet while my poor, wretched forty year old body tried desperately to expel whatever bit of contaminated sushi it was that gave me food poisoning. Not very glamourous. Although I was unexpectedly thin. My lovely birthday dinner cancelled, I spent the weekend reflecting on how I will NEVER EAT SUSHI again.

By Monday I was starting to feel better. Possibly even a little bit glamourous as a result of my newfound thin-ness. Until school phoned me and asked me to pick up Anna as she had stomach pains. I was a bit pissed off really - on Mondays Anna often has an ailment, and I send her off all jolly and she soon forgets about it. I thought the school were being hoodwinked, but when I turned up she was deathly pale and not looking too well at all. By the afternoon, I could see we were in for another kidney episode and took her off to the doctor who said she could be admitted to hospital. We actually managed to get through the night at home but she went in this morning, stayed for the day and had some IV antibiotics and fluids. She perked up late afternoon, and they said we could go home with some different medication. Now, of course, she is running a temperature of 40 degrees and I'm getting everything prepared for readmission. George has spent the last two nights at two different friends houses, as Andrew has been away on business, and frankly....

......being forty has been a bit shit.

No more winter!

Fundraising quiz night in Avalon. We went as the 'Get Smart' table.




Andrew didn't entirely understand the theme!

The funny thing about Australia is that it really doesn't have any sort of spring or autumn - or at least, nothing which the English could associate with those seasons. After what seems like months of wearing boots and jackets, the sun has suddenly come out and we are in shorts and slapping on the sunscreen again. On Saturday the temperature reached 27 degrees and this morning for the walk to the school bus at 7.25am, I only needed a t-shirt. The poor children, however, are obliged to wear their winter uniforms until the end of next week, when they break up for the spring holidays. After that, they will be back into their summer togs for the next two terms.



Naturally - eventually the men had to put the wigs on....




In the space of a couple of weeks, I have gone from switching on the electric blanket every night, to being too hot with the duvet on. And before you snort with derision at how pathetic we are with our leccy blanket, bear in mind that at night, the temperature can go down to 7 or 8 degrees, which is very manageable in an English house. However, we have all stud walls, no insulation anywhere, single pane windows, gaps at the bottom of outside doors letting a gale in, and NO heating of any sort. Now you see how quickly you would nip out for an electric blanket!

Summer sports have also started in earnest, so now we are into a round of cricket matches and practice, and the netball 'summer comp'. Andrew is even planning to play summer soccer (which I won't be watching as it takes place at 8am on a Sunday morning....). Anna wants to join Nippers (junior surf life savers) which is at 9am on Sunday mornings - nearly civilised and at least I get to lay on the beach while she does it.

The other way in which we definitely know that summer is on its way, is that we have had our first ant invasions (the first one, oddly, in the upstairs bathroom, the second - today - in the kitchen) and we have started to both hear cicadas and see their discarded shells. At dusk, as well, the rainbow lorikeets have restarted their deafening choir and the laughing kookaburras are beginning their hysterics earlier and earlier in the morning.

Some of you may know that Andrew and I celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary last week, and to celebrate we took ourselves off for a very swish lunch at a very swish hotel in the city. It must have been swish, as Will Ferrell and John C Reilly were hanging about in the lobby, before taking off in a fabulous yacht for the day. We realised later that they were in town to promote their new movie - Stepbrothers - and last night they were on 'Rove', the most important TV chat show here. They were very funny, and I think the kids would really enjoy the film.

Andrew and I are, of course, very pleased to have reached the 15 year milestone, and it made us think of all the people who were at our wedding and are still in our lives now. My dad also sent us a copy of the speech he made on the day, which still stood the test of time. I remember during the ceremony, the celebrant made the comment that he had not presided over a marriage before where the couple had promised to compromise. I think we've both compromised a fair bit over the years, and there have been dark times, but all in all, I'd say we are very lucky to have found each other and managed to make it to this stage. As Andrew once said - 'we deserve each other'...

(you now have permission to reach for the sick bucket...)

Speaking of marriages, we are dealing with another divorce in my family, and it has been difficult being away when you know that your support is needed. It's also disappointing on a personal level when there is a break up within the family. You invest in that relationship and love them because they are loved by your loved one, and because they are part of your family. When it ends, and especially when your loved one is left, it feels rather like you have all been rejected. Which in this case we very much have. But there is always Skype, texting and the phone, and Andrew was also able to give this gem of advice on finding a new partner when the time is right. My advice was to look for someone who was just nice - not fabulously sexy or great looking - but ordinary looking and a nice person. And without a terrible track record when it comes to marriage! Andrew called out from the background - 'that's what I did - and it worked for me!'. Hmmm...not sure if that is a compliment or not really....

Another important milestone to be reached this week is my 40th birthday on Saturday. I'm quite excited about it and not at all worried about being the big four ''o". Virtually everyone I know is either 40 or over, and they are happy, in good shape and enjoying life. There is no point looking back, and no point in having regrets, and
I'm going to be looking to the future. I'm going to work on spending less money on things, and spending more time with people and doing things. It should be fun!

Catch you after my hangover has worn off!



A nice walk at Manly Dam for Father's Day

New talents and new houses

Although I'm aware that I haven't yet completed all the uploading of photos etc from Beth's visit, I thought it would be nice to do a general update of what is going on Down Under these days. It seems like a while since we did that!

One big piece of news is that Anna's netball team won the Grand Finals having remained undefeated throughout the entire season. Winning the Final was no mean feat though for a number of reasons - the team they played against had only been beaten by them, and by a small margin, the weather was TERRIBLE and some of the team (including Anna, and their star player Charlie) were really very sick, and only on the court because we had turned up thinking it would be cancelled due to the wind and rain. Anna (and, as it turned out, Charlie) had been absent from school all week, with a really horrid virus which had been touring the school, and really seemed to have knocked them off their feet. A high temperature, sore throat, cough and headache thing. Anna hadn't really eaten for over 5 days and had lost a lot of weight, but she was determined to go, so on seeing the weather I agreed to drive her down to the courts on Saturday morning - convinced that it wouldn't go ahead. And it did! I've never suffered such horrid weather since we arrived here, and it was cold even by English standards. Add to that the rule that they must wear their netball dresses (mini skirts and no sleeves) and you had a recipe for a very guilty pair of mothers. Anna made it through 2 quarters and then retired back to bed till Tuesday. She was, however, very pleased with her trophy! We've got a few weeks off and then the summer competition starts....

George is still doing really well with his basketball, and now plays in a Saturday league for another team, as well as for school. He has also started having piano lessons again (he had a brief flirtation with this when we were in the UK) and he seems to be really enjoying it. He practises without being asked, and I think this is very much the result of him having a great young teacher who recognises that a 12 year boy needs a certain extra something to keep him interested. This has come in the form of learning to play both the theme from Star Wars and from James Bond. George needs to be more engaged in everything he does (he has a tendency not to be bothered about anything much - which he certainly didn't inherit from me!) and it is great to see him really interested in his basketball and piano. He has also said he would like to go to drama, so I am looking into that.

And the most exciting news for the moment is that we are moving house....again!! We haven't really warmed to the house we are currently living in, which although very large and on paper seems like a great place, just doesn't seem to work as a home. It's very dark, which I'm sure is great when it is very hot, but I just feel like I am stuck in a very big cave all the time. It also takes an awful lot of cleaning and tidying. The other problem has been the distance to school - although there is a school bus and quite a lot of children from St Lukes live up this end of the peninsula, we were just finding that we were spending far too much time making the journey up and down for school, sports and friends. We have found a gorgeous house in Beacon Hill, which will be only 7 mins from school by bus or car, and only half an hour into the city for Andrew (it is at least an hour from Mona Vale - 90 mins on a day like today when the Harbour Bridge was closed due to a big smash...). We are all very excited about the house, which is really beautiful, has a fabulous pool and spa and backs onto some lovely bushland. George will be within walking distance of a couple of school friends, and Anna has friends a very short distance away. We will not really be within walking distance of the beach, but even that will only be 10 mins away, and we usually find that we need to take so much clobber we need the car anyway!

The very bestest thing about the new house though is that we will be looking after Phil and Jenny's Bernese Mountain Dog there! He is called Bronson, is absolutely gorgeous and a great big softy! We should be in by the middle to end of October, and we'll let you have a change of address when we have dates etc.

Andrew has been sick lately with a really bad case of bronchitis, which has made him a bit miserable, but he's back to work now, and trying to shake it off. Touch wood, I haven't come down with any of these lurgies, and long may it remain so!

Today, as you will know, is 1st September, which in Australia is officially the first day of spring and predictably the temperature rose by about 3 degrees. The seasons are pretty simple here - spring is September, October, November, summer = December, January, February, autumn = March, April, May and winter = June, July, August. I was thinking about how it works in the UK and I decided on this

Winter - Oct, Nov, Dec, Jan, Feb
Spring - March and April
Summer - May, June
Winter - July, August
Autumn - September

plus any combination of the above.

I'm allowed to joke about it - I'm still English you know....